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Does Parenting This Way Scare You?

I must admit I still get a little nervous when I tell people I’m a parenting instructor. I mean, what on earth does that mean? Who do I think I am? Can you even have the answers to something so nuanced and changeable as parenting? And then this approach… it brings up so many different things from one person to the next. There’s a few who just embrace it, there’s a few who don’t want to hear a thing about it, there’s a few who totally misunderstand it and need a bit of help understanding, there’s a few who totally…

Connection Means Keeping The Connection Strong

(Not spending every waking minute with your child) When I was first led down the connected parenting path, I was feeling rather fragile. My dream of becoming a Mother had finally come true but I wasn’t as good as the super-nanny I had been. I wasn’t finding it easy at all and I had now come to this point which people were telling me was focal. They were saying we had to start “disciplining” our child as soon as possible. My child was 2 and I had absolutely no idea where to start. But it felt important. That’s what they…

Special Time Struggle

We live in a world where parenting is under-supported and many of us are juggling so many other commitments in our daily lives. When people ask me for parenting advice, one of the most important things I suggest is Special Time. I often see that look cross over their faces that says “HOW am I supposed to factor in extra time for one-on-one?!” followed by the question of “How often?” and then when I say “Well, daily would be ideal…” I can see that it sounds like the most ludicrous, unimaginable concept. BUT when I say this, I am actually…

Mind Your Manners!

I think the biggest roadblock we face in parenting little humans is changing the mindset around how we think about children both individually and as a society. One of the most difficult boulders along the path is the concept of “control”. For years now we have received the message that we need to control children or get them under control and for most of us, this was the cornerstone of how we were dealt with as children ourselves. The reality is that we shouldn’t desire to control anyone. It’s an incredibly disrespectful approach to human connection and relationships. Whilst some…

Flipping The Sibling Script

Siblings… argh!!!!!! The most disruptive thing I ever did to my household was add another child. Don’t get me wrong, this child makes my heart sing and I wouldn’t trade our reality for the world but a whole heap of problems came along from that moment. And I was naively unprepared. I did all those fluffy things like letting my firstborn play pregnant too and have their own baby, get the baby to give the firstborn a special present, read lots of books, etc. But then the baby came along and in another naive move I got excited at the…

Getting The Support You Deserve

As parents we are under-supported. No matter what wonderful systems you might have going we still don’t have enough financial support, physical support, mental and emotional support, etc. We could all do with a lot more help and the most important thing to realise and accept right now is that IT IS OK TO FEEL THAT WAY! We were meant to be raising children in villages, not in this fast-paced modern world (whilst trying to keep up with the Joneses). The cornerstone of good support may be the subject of an eye-roll from my regular readers… it is (you guessed…

My Child Won’t Talk To Me!

“Hey… how was your day?” “Good…” “What did you get up to?” “Stuff…” “Who did you play with?” “I dunno…” Sound familiar? Parents come from all walks of life and have many differing ideas when it comes to parenting and how it should be done but there are a few common themes. We all basically want the best for our children (as wide and varied as that may look) and we want to have open communication with them. We know that’s one of the best assurances to their well-being, knowing they can talk to us about anything BUT (as we…

Movies and Moving On

CONTENT WARNING: Mention of sexual assault/rape and misogyny You know that feel-good feeling you get when you’ve just finished a really great movie? It just makes you want to share it with someone else. One of the most fun experiences of parenthood is when you get to share an old favourite with your child for the first time. But then there’s that awful moment when you put on an old fave and suddenly realise it’s not appropriate for an 8-year-old or that the story-line is incredibly problematic. My latest indulgence whilst I clean and do chores has been to watch…

7 Saves When It’s All Too Much

My mental health became far more manageable once I realised (through parenting) the value of understanding, welcoming, celebrating and accepting all emotions. I used to feel like there was something wrong with me when I didn’t feel “happy” or “grateful” or wasn’t “enjoying every precious moment” with my children. Now I realise that there are many factors which can impact my mood and the mood of those around me and I know that for the most part as long as I acknowledge what I’m feeling, sit with it if need be, seek support to release it if necessary, then “this…

From Rupture To Repair

In my humble opinion there is almost nothing more important to role model to our kids than how to make a good repair. For our children to witness us owning up to our mistakes and connecting and empathising with how this has impacted any other human beings, is one of the greatest gifts we can give them. This is not always an easy thing. I know my issues surrounding apologising are lifelong. “Sorry” was a bit of a dirty word growing up. No one ever wanted to admit they were wrong. No one ever wanted to be that vulnerable and…