Browsing CategoryParenting By Connection

On Losing and Failing

The main aim in this game for everyone seems to be to become a relatively “good parent” with the view of that then aiding our own kids in becoming happy, well-adjusted, loving and loveable humans. Right?! It’s an awful lot of pressure… right?! Sometimes it seems an unobtainable goal. And sometimes it seems like the most important thing you will ever do. And it IS. Which IS an AWFUL LOT OF PRESSURE! And sometimes it feels like you’re drowning… Sometimes it feels like you’re collapsing under the weight and the pressure. I’M collapsing under the weight and the pressure. And…

Back To School

So… I haven’t written in ages!!! Life got in the way. I found myself busy with so many different things and then the 6 weeks of school holidays came along and I was realistic about the reality there was no way I would get anything done! So here we are… back to school… Gosh! That means so many things for so many people. For me it means a much quieter house, lunches (oh how I hate lunches), alarms AND I-should-be-homeschooling GUILT! But jumping off on that last bit… I do also feel some relief (oh, no that brings more guilt…

Getting The Support You Deserve

As parents we are under-supported. No matter what wonderful systems you might have going we still don’t have enough financial support, physical support, mental and emotional support, etc. We could all do with a lot more help and the most important thing to realise and accept right now is that IT IS OK TO FEEL THAT WAY! We were meant to be raising children in villages, not in this fast-paced modern world (whilst trying to keep up with the Joneses). The cornerstone of good support may be the subject of an eye-roll from my regular readers… it is (you guessed…

Movies and Moving On

CONTENT WARNING: Mention of sexual assault/rape and misogyny You know that feel-good feeling you get when you’ve just finished a really great movie? It just makes you want to share it with someone else. One of the most fun experiences of parenthood is when you get to share an old favourite with your child for the first time. But then there’s that awful moment when you put on an old fave and suddenly realise it’s not appropriate for an 8-year-old or that the story-line is incredibly problematic. My latest indulgence whilst I clean and do chores has been to watch…

7 Saves When It’s All Too Much

My mental health became far more manageable once I realised (through parenting) the value of understanding, welcoming, celebrating and accepting all emotions. I used to feel like there was something wrong with me when I didn’t feel “happy” or “grateful” or wasn’t “enjoying every precious moment” with my children. Now I realise that there are many factors which can impact my mood and the mood of those around me and I know that for the most part as long as I acknowledge what I’m feeling, sit with it if need be, seek support to release it if necessary, then “this…

SOS or Spoiled Outing Syndrome

What’s the deal with kids? You have the most amazing time with them and instead of just saying “Thanks, you guys are the best parents ever!”, they start to whinge or complain or even totally meltdown? Ok, parents and carers, prepare yourselves to breathe a huge sigh of relief that this is a legit, bona-fide, world-recognised thing and not just a special breed of heinous your own kids have conjured up! Hand In Hand Parenting call this phenomenon “Spoiled Outing Syndrome”. My kids have just started the school year and I know this means intense meltdowns and off-track behaviour due…

My Name Is Chantal… and I’m a Control Freak

Hi, my name is Chantal and I’m a control freak! Before I actually became a parent myself, I was God’s gift to parenting! MY kids were gonna be GREAT sleepers (I just wouldn’t give them any other choice, darling), they were going to eat only the healthiest foods (it’s all about making sure they never know there’s any other option), they were gonna be incredibly polite and well-behaved (you just have to set very clear boundaries). I mean, hello?! I was a brilliant nanny and that’s pretty much the same thing, right?! Hahahahahahahaha!!!! Anyway, we all know how that turned…

Thank You and Happy New Year!

Well.. it’s the last day of 2017 and globally it was a pretty horrendous year. There was much needless suffering and pain caused out there in the world at large and the small wins weren’t enough to balance those! I think most of us are more than happy to wash this year off and start again. I know I will certainly be setting some strong intentions for the new year coming. But on a personal level. This was my first full year of blogging. My goal was to produce an article a week and I stuck to that pretty well,…

Listen To Your Heart

I love how well-equipped children arrive to us. We have this societal view that it’s up to us to teach children all these things, that we need to train them, to get them educated, etc but the reality is they come to us with all the important things in place. Most of what we teach and drill into them is, again, more about society than what is important. The reality is we have a heck lot to learn from children. Thankfully, psychology (and hopefully most psychologists) have begun understanding the value of emotions. This is where I think children are…

Why Me?

Before another uninhibited deep dive into my neurosis, I want to preface with the purpose of why I am doing so: I have identified that one of my children is much harder for me to parent because they are so much like me. So at surface level that means they are strong-willed, indignant, dance to the beat of their own drum, want what they want when they want it, usually choose the path most cheeky, etc. All of which can be hard to parent at times but also amusing at others and essentially we try to celebrate the gift of…