Browsing CategorySpecial Time

Special Time Struggle

We live in a world where parenting is under-supported and many of us are juggling so many other commitments in our daily lives. When people ask me for parenting advice, one of the most important things I suggest is Special Time. I often see that look cross over their faces that says “HOW am I supposed to factor in extra time for one-on-one?!” followed by the question of “How often?” and then when I say “Well, daily would be ideal…” I can see that it sounds like the most ludicrous, unimaginable concept. BUT when I say this, I am actually…

Back To School

So… I haven’t written in ages!!! Life got in the way. I found myself busy with so many different things and then the 6 weeks of school holidays came along and I was realistic about the reality there was no way I would get anything done! So here we are… back to school… Gosh! That means so many things for so many people. For me it means a much quieter house, lunches (oh how I hate lunches), alarms AND I-should-be-homeschooling GUILT! But jumping off on that last bit… I do also feel some relief (oh, no that brings more guilt…

But I Don’t Want To Do Special Time!

There are two tools I almost always recommend for behavioural challenges, those being Listening Time and Special Time. We know we can’t pour from an empty cup. Special Time is a brilliant tool in which you connect with your child turning off/removing all distractions, making loads of eye contact, suspending rules, being wholeheartedly led and just delighting in your child. This is a really easy way to fill a child’s cup and let them know that they are uniquely special and loved. Whilst Listening Time is a great way to fill a parent’s cup and/or emptying out any liquid that…

SOS or Spoiled Outing Syndrome

What’s the deal with kids? You have the most amazing time with them and instead of just saying “Thanks, you guys are the best parents ever!”, they start to whinge or complain or even totally meltdown? Ok, parents and carers, prepare yourselves to breathe a huge sigh of relief that this is a legit, bona-fide, world-recognised thing and not just a special breed of heinous your own kids have conjured up! Hand In Hand Parenting call this phenomenon “Spoiled Outing Syndrome”. My kids have just started the school year and I know this means intense meltdowns and off-track behaviour due…

My Name Is Chantal… and I’m a Control Freak

Hi, my name is Chantal and I’m a control freak! Before I actually became a parent myself, I was God’s gift to parenting! MY kids were gonna be GREAT sleepers (I just wouldn’t give them any other choice, darling), they were going to eat only the healthiest foods (it’s all about making sure they never know there’s any other option), they were gonna be incredibly polite and well-behaved (you just have to set very clear boundaries). I mean, hello?! I was a brilliant nanny and that’s pretty much the same thing, right?! Hahahahahahahaha!!!! Anyway, we all know how that turned…

How To Celebrate The Gift Of The Strong-Willed Child

“Strong-willed children often grow into strong-willed adults who become world leaders, world shapers and world changers. Parenting them peacefully is not only possible, it’s imperative because sowing peace in their hearts now when they’re in our care will grow a future of peace later when the world is in their care.” – L R Knost Despite whatever unique challenges our children throw our way on a daily basis, we all adore them. Most of us can identify with that heart-bursting, unconditional love that comes along with this little person you’ve created. We know we should “cherish every moment” and there’s…

I Don’t Want To Be An Expert (In My Own Home)

Recently I reached out to my beautiful tribe for a topic suggestion or a Q&A and got a little more than I bargained for. My reaction to the Q&A question was an immediate cringe, a guffaw and then a “How the heck am I gonna answer this one?”. The issue being that I struggle with the same thing! This blogging is a vulnerable business and even worse is me trying to label myself an *hushed whisper* “expert” I periodically find myself avoiding that word but also struggling for another accurate one and questioning myself big-time. I mean what right do…

Roughhousing

Hmm… you know the old “Do as I say, not as I do?”… I can be a bit guilty of that one! See, it’s been a long time since I was introduced to and began to fully understand the value of roughhousing. Since then I have been a strong advocate and it’s one of the first tools I recommend to parents asking for help with behavioural issues (particularly aggression) but recently I stopped focusing on it in my own home. I had excuses (don’t we always) – “Not enough time!”, “My son does this in his Special Time, anyway!”, “Not…