Posts Tagged‘Parenting’

You CAN Do This!

Wake me up when it’s over, right? We have started this year in the most surreal of ways and none of us can be sure what is next. It’s a really hard time for everyone and I can only guess this is why in wake of the unconscionable and tragic loss of George Floyd’s life, people are globally standing up and speaking out and heartily proclaiming that Black Lives Matter. As a person who identifies as black, this came as a shock to me. This has been an internal thing within my own household where I educate my own children…

Connection Anxiety

Choosing to parent differently is a big deal. Particularly if your parents or their parents didn’t do things the same way. Especially if others in your peer group don’t. It can feel daunting. It can feel hard. You can feel a very natural urge to resist it and look for any excuse to take what seems like the “easy road”. When I first started asking questions and trying to gain an understanding of “peaceful parenting”, I kept being told “It’s a connection problem…”, “Your child is not feeling connected…” and I would be so triggered. I wanted everyone to know…

Does Parenting This Way Scare You?

I must admit I still get a little nervous when I tell people I’m a parenting instructor. I mean, what on earth does that mean? Who do I think I am? Can you even have the answers to something so nuanced and changeable as parenting? And then this approach… it brings up so many different things from one person to the next. There’s a few who just embrace it, there’s a few who don’t want to hear a thing about it, there’s a few who totally misunderstand it and need a bit of help understanding, there’s a few who totally…

Connection Means Keeping The Connection Strong

(Not spending every waking minute with your child) When I was first led down the connected parenting path, I was feeling rather fragile. My dream of becoming a Mother had finally come true but I wasn’t as good as the super-nanny I had been. I wasn’t finding it easy at all and I had now come to this point which people were telling me was focal. They were saying we had to start “disciplining” our child as soon as possible. My child was 2 and I had absolutely no idea where to start. But it felt important. That’s what they…

Mind Your Manners!

I think the biggest roadblock we face in parenting little humans is changing the mindset around how we think about children both individually and as a society. One of the most difficult boulders along the path is the concept of “control”. For years now we have received the message that we need to control children or get them under control and for most of us, this was the cornerstone of how we were dealt with as children ourselves. The reality is that we shouldn’t desire to control anyone. It’s an incredibly disrespectful approach to human connection and relationships. Whilst some…

Can I Be Sh*t Today?

In this moment I feel low and lethargic and I don’t have the energy or the motivation to do anything. That’s ok… those feelings don’t stress me out like they used to. I know that the wave will pass and something better (or worse) will come in its place but I can get out, I won’t be stuck here. But then I have to parent. I have two little humans who will allow me to be crappy and crabby for brief periods but then they will demand more. I will demand more. So I want to take a little moment…

NOT Guilty!

Today we were meant to go away so my husband had taken a leave day and kept it when our plans changed. With both kids at school, we unexpectedly have a whole day together. We had initially planned to do some super responsible things but I spent most of the night back and forth with my youngest and my husband had been off sick this week so we decided to “take it easy”. OMG!!! That concept is just SO HARD! As a parent, my “day off” is supposed to be super productive (and it usually is). So the idea of…

Why Me?

Before another uninhibited deep dive into my neurosis, I want to preface with the purpose of why I am doing so: I have identified that one of my children is much harder for me to parent because they are so much like me. So at surface level that means they are strong-willed, indignant, dance to the beat of their own drum, want what they want when they want it, usually choose the path most cheeky, etc. All of which can be hard to parent at times but also amusing at others and essentially we try to celebrate the gift of…

The Worst Thing I Ever Did

I’ve gone on and on about Listening Time but I haven’t really gone into all the options for it (maybe a future post). One that I had heard of was connecting with what was happening in your life when you were your child’s age. Now I am very holistic and I love all things within that realm. I love a lot of people who work within that realm too but there’s also a skeptic in me (maybe also my husband’s influence) and I don’t love her voice but sometimes it gets very loud! So I have found myself feeling a…

Q & A: Parenting as a Partnership

Question: One thing that I need advice on is working better as a team with James. Because I spend the most time with Liam, I have ways that I do things, and I find when he is around that I tell him what to do a lot, and that makes him feel bad/inadequate/judged/not appreciated. I certainly don’t mean for him to feel that way, but I feel that unless he has a specific reason or particularly strong feeling for doing something a different way, he should respect that I have developed strong routines based on research and much time and…